The next round is on me
Whoa. There she goes again.
Grand Theft Auto IV. She's so beautiful, so impeccably crafted; nothing could possibly compete with her perfection. The men flock, the women envy. The nerds run and hide in fear of being seen with their
Dungen's and Dragon's handbooks. It's no secret; she's the prize in video games Cracker Jack box. But everyone seems to be afraid of mentioning her hideous moles, or sex change surgeries.
Not only is
Grand Theft Auto IV far from perfect; it hardly feels revolutionary or, to dumb it down, new. The screen glitches and excessive baggage that should have been addressed at this point in the franchise have not been, and many of the new innovations were simply brought about my past versions of the series. Rockstar Games, to put it nicely,
pulled a Madden.
The AIDS that is GTA's camera system is completely unforgiving, as it has been since they've gone 3D. You'd think at this point, I wouldn't have to move the camera to see over a hill or around my vehicle. Being that the camera isn't directly behind the car, for reasons beyond me, it makes for some very difficult getaways without at least some help from the screen.
And oh how I love those melee controls! There's nothing better than losing a fight because you swung and 'missed' the hot dog vendor, only to have him hit you with a vicious combination and grant you a one way ticket to the paramedics room. And the auto-aim hardly ever goes where it's supposed to, and when it does go ary, you can't put it where you want it anyway. But don't worry, to correct this problem, Rockstar has enabled you the ability to by-pass the auto-aim. Yes, because in the heat of a gun fight, we are all capable of applying feather-like pressure on a button and perform just as well as we would have without it. Nice try.
The friends constantly nagging you to engage in social activities is making me consider hanging out with my mom on weekends and watch
The View. A major point of a video game is to get AWAY from annoying people and immerse yourself in your surroundings. The last thing I need is to go play darts with my leech of a cousin. What reason do I have to play this game if it's making the situation worse? If I wanted to be bothered by people, I'd go to work or throw eggs at moving vehicles. At some point in the game, you'll lose complete interest in these people, and continue on playing the regular story, but the fact that it was even included is just too realistic for my taste-buds.
Multi-player, an idea brought about mainly after the release of San Andreas' two-player game modes, is about as half-ass as the
Arizona Cardinals War Room. Of the 16 game modes to choose from, 3 might catch your eye as something you'd want to enjoy with your friends. Granted, it is an excellent idea, they sure did leave a lot to be desired. The fact that weapons must be picked up everytime is a bit of a tease and drag, as well. It's not much fun running around collecting your favorite weapons, only to get blindsided and have to do it all over again.
Even with all of this, there is still one glaring, annoying, destructive problem that I've yet to mention; graphics. I can't tell you how many times I've seen images pop in and out of the screen, whether it's 2 miles away or 2 feet. What I thought would be a joy-ride in a helicopter turned out to be a virtual disaster of meshed colors and blobs. It's been around in all of the GTA games, but it's a lot less noticable when the system is older and when so many ground-breaking features are also being brought to the table.
GTA: IV has had their dog eat their homework too many times. And don't tell me they can't retify this situation because the city is too large and there is too much going on; I've played
Assassin's Creed.
Although, having said this, there are some improvements. I'm very fond of the physics engine for driving cars and such, and detailed animations with an interesting story are great. But with all the bitter, we're supposed to get an equal, or more, amount of sweet. I feel like
GTA:IV short-changed us a bit. It's the same cars, city, story-line structure, and basic ideas of every other Grand Theft Auto in the series. If they choose to take a step backwards in size and additions, they'd better take a step forward with gameplay and new ideas. I don't think they did.
With the facts all out on the table,
GTA:IV will provide you with endless hours of entertainment, and is an absolute buy if you don't have it already. Only a game of this magnitude can receive an entire article worth of insults and immediately be followed with a positive remark. There is nothing on the market that will give you as much for your money, and provide you with the ultimate gaming experience like
Grand Theft Auto IV will.
The moral of the article is this; the next time you see that pretty girl at your local bar, first ask if she was once a man, and second, remember; it's not all about the sex.
Official Score - 9.5
+ Excellent, Immersive Story
+ Great Physics-Driving
+ It's Grand Theft Auto
- It's Deja Vu
- Roman
- ...and all the other friends of Niko's
- Camera is annoying
- Melee is annoying
- Shooting is annoying
- Multi-player could use work
- Graphic problems