Do you struggle with emotional instability?

Looking back on my life, I think the single biggest obstacle for my happiness and success has been emotional instability.

I remember being oversensitive since I was a small kid, but it got a lot worse during my teenage and early adulthood years.

I went to therapy for a long time then, but it didn't have an immediate effect. In retrospective I think it did help a lot, since my therapist tried hard to instill in me good habits that would later help me a lot in life ( like doing regular exercise), but at the time it seemed hopeless.

When I turned 26, I moved to another country and faced huge economical challenges. Oddly enough, that helped me a lot. It changed me as a person and forced me to assume more habits that would ultimately benefity my mental health.

Lately in my life, I have felt that when I am busy, working, studying and working out hard, my mood is great and stable and really enjoy life. But If I face a very tense situation both my mood and my habits will be dramatically affected and will slip down in to my previous self for a week or two.

Anyway, made this thread to ask other people about their own situation.

Are you very emotionally stable ? Do you struggle with this problem ? And do you have any tools, mindsets or habits that help you out ?

I suffer from depression, so I am frequently in a sour mood. I take medication and it helps somewhat. At least it's not as bad as it used to be. I very rarely get suicidal thoughts, which is a step in the right direction. Every day is a new opportunity. Every day possesses something new to discover or new to conquer. There's always something to look forward to. Always.

According to my religion, life is an incredibly precious gift. To throw it away would be improper and tragic. I don't make judgments on someone's soul if they commit suicide, though. When someone is suicidal, they are not in their right mind. I don't think that suicide is an automatic ticket to Hell.

@dracula_16: I been there. When I was in my worst time I was taking Clonazepam. It helped me a lot with my mood, but it would wreck my memory. To a point in which I couldn't work.

I now think over the long term you have to rely on good habits to make you happy, but sometimes when it gets to dark medication helps.

I wouldn't say I suffer from instability, at least in the sense that I am close to breaking provided certain stressors exist. I tend to handle stress quite well.

I'm more just constantly, mildly depressed and anxious and self-conscious.

I am really fond of people, I just struggle with being myself around them--and it can be really draining.

I'm lucky enough to work with many I consider my friends and just seeing them at my job is enough. I don't really miss people when I'm not around them, in other words. Though I do feel obligated to work on our friendships and maintain them better than I do.

Gratitude is key for me. Not just for happiness, but for success. One of the common factors for successful, happy people is gratitude. And I don't mean being thankful for the big stuff, I'm talking constant a regular thanks, praise, and worship (not religiously, just...acknowledgement) for things like waking up refreshed. A warm shower on a cold day. Going to bed knowing you can sleep in. A hug from your niece. A pretty sunrise. A nice encounter with another person. A job well done. A compliment, or complimenting another. Training a coworker. Teaching a friend something.

Just constantly express gratitude and you will rewire your brain to naturally gravitate towards a more positive mental state.

Also, and it's cliche at this point, but HEALTHY BODY = HEALTHY MIND! Just get moving. You don't even need to really do anything so long as you just make a point to eat somewhat healthy--and I don't mean health food, just, you know...a well-balanced diet of mostly vegetables and wholesome protein--and do some exercise every day like weights or walking or swimming.

Finally, breathing exercises for when you do sense a break coming on, or are in stressful situations. I used to do the whole in for five seconds, hold for five seconds, out for five seconds but that can be a little hard to do on the spot.

Now what I do is two quick puffs in and long exhale. This is actually the bodies unconscious response to really stressful situations, but you can do it consciously to great effect. It's seriously surprising just how well it works. And if it doesn't, then do some actually meditative breathing like I said earlier. I like to imagine myself at the beach, the long breath in the wave breaking on the beach, a long hold, then the long breath out being the sound of the water receding and building up again.

I’m severely chronically ill, have been since 20 (I have a tumor surrounding my subclavian artery and main nerve branch to my left arm). Easier to show in explanation:

Tumor is now smaller after many years of chemo. This disease is, to put it mildly, terrifying and never affords me the luxury of emotional stability, though any period of instability is chump change comparatively to the days of initial diagnosis and treatment which were just an absolute whirlwind of chaos. Living with it is just taking it a day at a time, and a breath at a time if needs be. Lots of power to be found in the moment. Narcotics are never unappreciated, and it shames me not one iota to say so. Blessed are these little pills. I’m also Bipolar II since youth, but age has mellowed my cycles significantly, or maybe I’ve grown accustomed to the constant mind****. I’m fortunate to have loving parents who have been supportive throughout.

Dracula, I appreciate your stance on suicide. 👍🏼 It’s nice to see those who understand those who are at such a point are not thinking straight. Impossible for me to hold them in judgement.

@mrbojangles25: interesting. I actually sometimes use the breathing trick. I learned it from the huberman podcast.

I like your methods too. I don't usually practice gratitude, but I do try to exercise and eat healthy. Frankly, I am better at the first than the second.

@MirkoS77: sorry to hear about your disease. It certainly puts my own problems in to perspective.

Don't know if this can be cured it treated, but I hope it gets better over time.

Back in the day, but things are relatively boring now. The way I like it. No drama or bullshit, fairly simple life.